Part 2 of Unplugged and Reconnected – Learn about the right hemisphere of your brain
In Part 1 of this 3-part series on digital detox, I bluntly delivered the truth: We need a collective intervention for our obvious addiction to devices and social media. Fortunately, we have a few champions of this cause: Jonathan Haidt and Anna Lembke have teamed up to protect our kids from the harms of both. A new coalition of interventionists for us adult is similarly ramping up: Arthur C. Brooks, Dan Harris, Andrew Huberman and Dr. Ritchie Davidson are all using their influence and platforms to not only sound the alarms, but offer solutions.
I also shared with you that Axios had an article about bars and restaurants now implementing phone-free policies. I could see this coming and I applaud it.
It is simple, collective actions that help us break bad habits – the ones that have become so acculturated over the past 14 years we rarely give our bad habits a second thought.
That word – acculturated – has become a new favorite of mine. It harkens back to David Foster Wallace in his famous college address where he offered the parable about young fish not even knowing what water was.
When iPhones, social media and Google all were poured into our social culture, we quickly acclimated to it. We were told it would connect us, bring us together, expand our worldviews by bringing the big wide world right into our pockets. We were lemmings, diving in and jumping on board. We were hooked.
Did anyone see what was coming – 10 or 14 years down the road, when we’d all be so attached to our devices that we have a near panic attack when we misplace our phones?
Not at first – because we were all dazzled by being able to ask Google or Siri a pressing question with great ease. I remember my mid-30’s son who lived 3,000 miles across the country being so excited about Facebook. He was convinced that it would be a snap to stay connected to high school and college friends, to draw family members closer. He imagined a social pool of connection and belonging. He was all in.
I had some doubts — and over time, I realized that he was actually not feeling so good with this steady diet of social media. There was a lot of comparison with those highlight reels of friend’s lives. At about this same time, Brene Brown was warning us that comparison is the thief of joy. The constant comparison created a culture of envy and jealousy, of trying to keep up with the Joneses and slowly shifted us away from real connection and a deep sense of belonging. We got lost in the scrolling and we lost touch with those who and what actually matters most.
We were slowly, over time, acculturated.
As Arthur Brooks points out in his newest book, The Meaning of Your Life, this growing social culture of devices and social media began to take up a lot of space in our daily lives, and without us even being aware – it trapped us into a dependence on the left side of our brains. Like the young fish in David Foster Wallace’s parable, we were swimming in water without being aware. We were in it — hook, line and sinker.
And what was sinking was our ability to focus, to stay present, to ask deep questions. We became consummate consumers. We lost touch with the right side of our brain where we curate, question, get creative and curious — and even challenge the status quo.
We have reached a critical tipping point. Thank goodness for the many researchers and influencers who recognize the trajectory of our human evolution is taking a deep dive in the wrong direction. We have to harness the full power and potential of our remarkable brains to bring us back to reality and humanity. Right now, we are much like a kite about to plummet. Folks like Arthur Brooks, Dr. Ritchie Davidson and Dr. Laurie Santos want us to take control, take back our attention and focus, and begin to balance our lives with both sides of our brains.
Over the past two weeks, I have been reading Born to Flourish by Dr. Ritchie Davidson, as well as The Meaning of Your Life by Arthur Brooks. I have also been listening to podcasts where both Dr. Davidson and Arthur Brooks have been guests. I confess that when it comes to neuroscience and psychology, I am often an early adopter. So, I have been implementing some of the tips, tools and insights they are suggesting to address my own device and social media addiction.
What I am discovering has been rather astounding.
I am doing just as Arthur suggested: No phone for the first hour after working, no phone for at least an hour before bed, no phone at meal times and no phone when I am getting exercise or out in nature.
I noticed some profound benefits almost immediately. Admittedly, I have a healthy morning routine that includes meditation, journaling, reading and writing — so staying off the phone first thing was easy for me. But what I noticed is that if I do pick up my phone and engage with email, texts or social media – my ability to stay interested in the very books I love, wanes. I shift out of a flow state of learning and creating and into a state of distraction.
Taking walks in nature without earbuds tucked in and talking heads accompanying me has truly been a very beneficial reset. As Dr. Ritchie Davidson offered in his conversation with Dr. Andrew Huberman, just taking a walk and letting our minds wander with us is a form of meditation. We observe thoughts, emotions and attention drifting. We can actually engage with that content surfacing in our mind — and it is endlessly fascinating. My walks in nature have made me consciously aware of my 5 senses; I am in wonder of my breathing; and I do think about how small I am in comparison to the wide universe all around me. Lately, on these nature walks I try to imagine being with our astronauts on the Artemis – and what it must be like to be way out there circling the moon gazing back here at planet earth. Dacher Keltner would be proud of me for being awed on so many levels on a 20-minute walk in nature. Dacher is best known for his research on the science of AWE at Berkley.
The open-ended, observation approach to a walking meditation in nature gives me a feeling of being grounded and calm. Dr. Ritchie would emphasize that the operative word in that statement is “being”. He urges us to build more time and awareness into being rather than constantly “doing”. He wants us to tap into the human being that we are, with awareness. I feel more connected to myself since I unplugged the earbuds and am taking more solitary walks with me, myself and I.
Eating my meals without binging a Netflix show, scrolling for entertainment or watching the news, has been delightfully surprising. I actually enjoy my meal and am well aware of the first bite and most noticeably, the last. I find I am eating slower, savoring the textures and tastes, and often feel quite satisfied. That old habitual craving for some dark chocolate after my meal dissipated.
The other thing that has been rather remarkable is that I am now consciously aware of how the “incubation” that organically occurs in our brains has been so stimulating. I am more creative, more curious and am having more “aha” moments. Dr. Ritchie Davidson and Adam Grant both would say “I told you so” if they heard me share this observation. When our brains are cut loose, both those right and left hemispheres work in tandem to help us solve problems in dynamic ways. Both of them sight how our aha moments often come in the shower — where we are awash in letting go of devices, narrowed attention and a plethora of distractions.
Well, it turns out that when we unplug from our devices and let our minds wander, our incredible incubation process gets to work, with very little cognitive expenditure and effort on our part. Ideas and problem solving occur naturally.
Let me summarize the interventions that I took to heart over the past two weeks. I am living proof that adopting a few of these small practices makes a meaningful difference:
- No phone an hour after waking
- No phone an hour before bed
- No phone at meals
- No phone while working out or on nature walks
Now here are the benefits I noticed:
- Greater ability to stay interested and engaged with what I love most.
- The incubation process is coming online with greater frequency and delightfully surprising aha moments.
- I can more easily notice my thoughts and emotions drifting without tension in my mind. Sometimes these observations make me laugh, sometimes they give me pause. Quite frequently, they take me on walks down memory lane that are simply priceless.
- I’m enjoying my food more and feeling satisfied.
- My five senses have been re-awakened. I hear more birds, feel the breeze or some warm sunshine on my skin, I caught the scent of that pot of hyacinths in my kitchen before I even entered the room. I observe more details through my eyes, ears, nose, mouth and touch. My first cup of coffee tastes otherworldly. I notice textures of my clothes, subtle background noises come forward, I see more textures and depth in my environment. (Andrew Huberman tells us that shifting our gaze from near to far, and from narrow to landscape is very beneficial for our brains).
I want to be part of the collective initiative to kick the habit of devices and social media. So I am taking the tips, tools and insights to heart. And I am sharing what I am discovering with all of you.
In just two short weeks, I am already gaining some remarkable benefits from the switch. Have I inspired you to give some of them a try?
Part 3 of this series is where I wrap up with some more personal insights and resources you can investigate.
Remember that this website is designed to provide you with easy access to science-based insights to help you take control of your life in healthy, sustainable ways. As Eric Zimmer would say – Little by Little.
Noteworthy Resources:
