Life’s Lookout Points
So often in life, we look back, then at where we are and then we gaze into a rather ephemeral future. We wish for a crystal ball. But Aiko Bethea, a dynamic life coach changes the order of things. Look to the future, then revisit the past and lastly — look around at the present.…
A False Sense of Urgency
Aiko Bethea’s book explores the pervasive issue of false urgency in modern life. She highlights how individuals often rush to act without fully understanding situations, driven by learned responses and distractions. By recognizing and retraining our reactions, we can practice curiosity and assess urgency more accurately before taking action.
Change Is Constant, So We Need to be Consistent
Jim Collins tells us that building our self-knowledge is an imperative for the fast-paced world we live in. Seth Godin makes the clear distinction that real authenticity is being consistent in all areas of our life. We can use our self knowledge to be our anchor and our compass.
Accountability is a Prerequisite for Learning
If you cringe when someone tells you to be accountable, then this post is for you. Aiko Bethea redefines accountability in a way that makes it feel good, empowering and aspirational. Its just a prerequisite for learning.
Core Values are Both an Anchor and North Star
You just need two core values to become foundational principles you can live by. Aiko Bethea helps reframe the relevance of being anchored by your core values and having a North Star to guide you.
Contemplate This
If you were to spend just 5-10 minutes a day contemplating what you felt, learned or discovered by something that happened today, you’d be amazed at the positive benefits you’d harvest. Contemplate more, scroll less.
How to Help Your Brain When It’s Stuck On Disagreement
If you find yourself going round and round with common, recurring disagreements – this post is for you. We can take 5 easy steps to intervene iin what feels as dizzying as a merry-go-round and find some solid, common ground.
Your Brain on Disagreement
Did you know that your brain is under a lot of unconscious influence when it is on disagreement? Prepare to be amazed to discover that it is hard to find common ground when our brain is not helping us.
Are You Consistent or Coherent in How You Show Up?
There is a clear distinction between being consistent and being coherent in who we really are – and how we are showing up in the many roles we have. RaQuel Hopkins invites us to get very clear on being consistently coherent with our core values.
All Feelings Are Welcome, All Behaviors Are Not
Imagine a Welcome Mat at your front door emblazoned with these house rules: All feelings are welcome, all behaviors are not. What a shift in how we would show up for our loved ones!
Ouch! That Hurt!
Why do we not reflexively respond to an emotional or psychological injury we caused the same way we do an accidental physical injury. Shift the awareness and accountability fast with your word choice!
The Complementary Combo of Capacity & Resilience
Capacity and Resiliency go hand in hand – a very complementary duo for life. And who better than the dynamic duo of Scott Barry Kaufman and RaQuel Hopkins to help us develop both!
The Three Stages of Personal Breakthroughs
In his latest book, Contemplation, Richard Rudd gives a clear picture of the 3 stages of personal breakthroughs: allow, accept and embrace. Learn how to work through each stage and to flourish!
Pause – And Then Pivot
“Every pause is a field of transformation”. This single sentence offered by author Richard Rudd instantenously shifts us into the many choices we can make in a split second. Put a Pivot Practice to work for you.
Seismic NATALIE Moments (Part 3)
Seismic NATALIE Moments often require us to reinvent ourselves and create a new normal. These can be transformational pivot points – and they often take time, unfolding slowly and steadily, one step at a time.
Golden Opportunities – NATALIE Moments Can Be Lucky Breaks (Part 2)
If we aren’t paying close attention, we might miss a golden opportunity. It’s not the lucky break alone, it is what we do with them! Inspired by Jim Collins and NATALIE Moments in Life.
Making the Most of NATALIE Moments (Part 1)
You’ve experienced them but didn’t have a name for them. NATALIE Moments – those disruptions to the normal flow of life that can take you off course and require you to tap into your capacity reserves. Jim Collins coined the phrase NATALIE Moments – and today we start with the small ones.
Re-Imagining and Re-Inventing Ourselves
What can you draw on from your past experiences that can help you reframe, repurpose and reinvent yourself – yet again?
The Sweet Spot
There is a healthy balance between co-dependency and counter-dependency. Like any health paradox, we can find a happy medium – time alone and time together.
Are You Driving Your Life with Dirty Fuel?
We rarely think about the grade of fuel we are using to drive our lives. Joe Hudson, Master Coach, would tell you that clean fuel will get your farther every time.
Supercommunicators Facilitate Self Discovery
Maya Angelou taught us that while we might not remember what someone said to us, we would most assuredly remember how they made us feel. If you feel better about yourself after a deep conversation with someone, you may have been in the presence of a supercommunicator. Learn more about yourself from this special kind…
Kitchen Sinking
Kitchen sinking is a communication pattern during arguments where one person throws “everything but the kitchen sink” into the discussion. Instead of focusing on one specific issue, they bring up the past. Kitchen sinking can sink the relationship. Find out how to avoid this overload.
Compassionate Curiosity
Consider your bedside manner when it comes to self-examination Socrates offered timeless wisdom: The unexamined life is not worth living. Perhaps he would modify it today to reflect that an unexamined life will be lived regardless; it will just be a lot harder than it has to be. Dr. Paul Conti, author of What’s Going Right, has…
No One Wants To Be Controlled or Manipulated
What if we reframed self discovery and personal growth as fun? What if we believed that really getting to know ourselves was the key that unlocked our agency and empowerment? Dr. Paul Conti invites us to embrace this new model for personal growth.
Agency and Autonomy
We confuse agency and autonomy. We even use the words interchangeably. The reality is that we always have agency even when our personal autonomy is in fact constrained in some way. Discover the distinction.
Are You Attached to a Label That Keeps You Stuck?
If you believe you are stuck with an attachment style you adopted as a kid, prepare for a dynamic breakthrough. Our attachment styles are varied and malleable.
We Know We Would Benefit, But It is Just So Hard to Change
Ever wish you could just lay your head on a book and have all the knowledge transfer automatically to your brain? That’s not how it works but it is actually easier than you might think to make real change.
Do You Know What Your Brain Can Do?
The final part of his 3-part series on a digital detox and tapping into the power of both the right and left brain. You don’t need another app — your brain can already do some amazing stuff!
Healthy Replacements for Unhealthy Scrolling
Part 2 of the 3 Part Series on a digital detox and rediscovering the right side of brain! Find more creativity and curiosity by actively engaging the right side of your brain.
Unplugged and Reconnected
Ever wonder why you feel less creative and curious these days? it’s because we forget to engage often with the right side of our brain. To ask deep questions and ponder possibilities. We need a digital detox.
Integration is the Next Big Step
Dr. Becky Kennedy reminds us that we don’t need one more parenting tool. What we do need is start using the stockpile we already have. Integrating relationship tools and skills is the next big step for all of us.
A Transformational Shift in Our Human Evolution Has Taken Root
We have at our disposal a very warm and healthy ecosystem for personal growth and lifelong self development. Two decades of game-changing research have taken root — and brought us to this flourishing environment. Let’s grow!
Do the Work Actually Means Putting Skills and Tools to Work
You may read a lot of books and listen to endless podcasts. You now have curated a lot of awareness and knowledge. But the real work happens when you integrate psychological tools and skills – when you put it all to work FOR you.
Cultivate a Mattering Practice
We do matter to each other. We just need to be reminded. This post is inspired by the book Mattering. Honestly I am deeply curious why we need a book to state the obvious. We need to let each other know — we matter.
Let’s Create Flourishing Family EcoSystems
So much of self help points us to dysfunctional family dynamics that predisposed us to run for cover, hide our gifts and stunt our growth. The only dynamic component was generational hand me downs of poor coping skills and protective armor. There’s a better way – creating a flourishing family ecosystem where everyone thrives.
Make The Most Important Human Connection
The most important human connection is the one you make with yourself. To show up in every part of your life as your most authentic self, you need to build self-trust and let go of false pretenses.
The Three Buckets of Our Human Capacity
If you’ve ever thought to yourself, I just don’t have the capacity to deal with everything right now, this post is for you. Inspired by RaQuel Hopkins, the capacity expert, who tells us to build our mental, emotional and relational capacity
Looking for Life Lessons in All The Wrong Places
What is the one life lesson you have to keep learning over and over? Discover why self-reflection is an important part of helping life lessons stick.
Quick Recovery Is A Slowing Process
Slowing down when we get emotionally triggered, helps us recover faster. Learn more about faster emotional recovery.
The Best Selfie is Self-Reflection
Instead of looking at your selfies from 2025, reflect on pivotal moments that shifted something in you.
Personal Growth is Not Linear
Even Maslow amended his theory about human needs and personal growth. It is a lifetime process not levels we complete and move on to the next. Rethink and rediscover how personal growth really happens throughout our lifetime.
How We Meet Each Other In the New Year
As we head in 2026, consider two tools that will help you meet others where they are in game-changing ways. Variability and Co-Regulation are power tools for better relationships.
Kevin Love’s Game-Changing BreakThrough
All-Star Basketball player, Kevin Love had a court-side breakdown in 2017. It became a Pivot Point and new Trailhead for him. His public panic attack led him to become a leader in emotional and mental healthy activism. Read his inspirational story.
Unlock Your Potential: The Evolution of Self-Discovery
We are not projects that need to be fixed. It’s time to stop labeling ourselves as broken. We are ever-evolving adventurers seeking self-discovery and sustainable growth. We are self-actualizing.
A Perch and Small p Purpose
Harvard’s 84 year old study on Human Happiness reveals so many nuggets of wisdom we can put into practice today. A perch is our station or stage in life; the one we are in right now. Our small p purpose is the one that aligns with our present stage of life. This perspective changes everything!
Self-Compassion is a Soft Skill that Strengthens Us
We might think that a soft skill like self-compassion is pretty fragile, like a bubble that could easily burst. Let’s bust that myth instead. Self Compassion builds strength, resilience and grit. Discover the strength of self-compassion.
Can You Catch Yourself in the Act of an Old Habit?
One of the most powerful tools for real change is to “catch ourselves in the act” just as we are about to fall into an old habit. Discover tools to help you get over that hurdle.
Self Awareness Leads to More “Other” Awareness
Once we truly know ourselves fairly well, we can find it a lot easier to be generous in our assumptions about others. We know that we have off days and moments when we are overwhelmed. We loosen the reins on judgment and become much more compassionate about others.
Mastering Emotions: The Power of Labeling
Go “under the hood” and discover how two different sections of your brain are actually designed to work in tandem. Labeling your emotions initiaties this interplay and exchange of information.
What Is Your Emotional Mindset?
Did you know that if you use a growth mindset when it comes to working “with” your emotions, you will be amazed at how creative you can get. You can lighten emotions, shape and contour, deepen them even.
Eggshells and Landmines
Most of us are quite familiar with walking on eggshells or trying to avoid landmines when we are around some people with emotional volatility. Discover how some mental imagery can shift you psychologically to handle these situations more skillfully.
Self Discoveries We Make From Our Relationships
What might you discover about yourself when you pay attention to how you show up differently depending on whom you are with? Our most revelational self discoveries happen in our relationships?
Harnessing Self-Discovery Through Journaling
I offer a little peek into my own journaling practice. When I need to work things out, I write it out. The writing prompts that Ryan Holiday offers in the Daily Stoic Journal help me dive a little deeper in my self discovery process.
Bridging the Gaps in Personal Growth
Do you have a plan to fill the gap between “you are here” and where you want to go? This post helps you see those gaps in a more creative way. Build the bridges that closes the gaps.
Beyond Hero, Villain, Victim: Discover New Game Pieces
We give away our power and our agency when we stay in these familiar roles: hero, victim, villain. Brene Brown offers us a game-changing skill set in her new book, Strong Ground. Empower yourself and choose to be a creator, a coach or a challenger!
Note to Self
When you make a mental note, stop to consider if the receiver is your future self or younger self. Who is the author of those insights? Your present self or your future self? Did you discover an old journal note from your younger self? Mental otes to self are our personal cliff notes!
Don’t Tap Out Too Soon
If we tap out too soon, when things are getting hard and may be thinking we aren’t really making progress, we just might miss the growth spurt. Brene Brown inspired this post about staying with it – the discomfort and uncertainty – longer than you might usually do. See what you’re made of and don’t…
Build Your Personal Coaching Staff
There are science-backed benefits to coaching. We get very clear on our goals, have someone who helps us create actionable steps and holds us accountable. And we can circle back in real time to get honest feedback and do a little self reflection. Step up your game when it comes to managing life with better…
When Things Fall Apart
When things fall apart, we often use some form of the word broken: Heartbreak, broken dreams, breakdowns. However, when things fall apart they actually open us up to new discoveries and revelations.
Dancing With Our Human Nature
It’s human nature to dance around the patterns of behavior that aren’t serving us well. It’s also human nature to develop dance patterns with those we love – and often we step on each other’s toes. Learn how to nurture your nature from Robert Greene’s insights.
